prayer

The Reason behind the Storm

~ Observant Servant

Recently one of my good friends was going through a lot of turmoil. Attacks from the enemy right and left. The attacks came physically, emotionally, and through friends and neighbors. The enemy was hitting her quite hard. This went on for several months. When it came to her health, doctors could find nothing wrong. It was clearly a spiritual attack.

Often she would confide in me, and in others and she would tell me what others had stated. “You just need to pray more, have more faith, close doors, make sure you are reading your Bible, capturing your thoughts and renewing your mind. Is there anyone you are not forgiving? Maybe that’s why. You need to really, really forgive.”

The thing was, she was doing all those things. I knew because she would tell me about how she spent a LOT of time in the Word, praying, fasting, seeking God ect.. And yet still her torment continued and she ended up taking months off work because it got so bad.

The enemy had it out for her. Was she doing something wrong? Was she bringing this on herself?

I went through something similar during her ordeal and for a little while after. Though admittedly not quite to the extent my friend had. Sure I had my health hit a bit. I also had strange happenings at the Healing House I manage. I had car trouble, attacks in my sleep.. (and although I wasn’t afraid, I was wondering… “Why is this happening? What is going on?”)

Like my friend, I had also reached out for prayer. And like my friend I was met with the same responses. “You just need to pray more, have more faith, close doors, make sure you are reading your Bible, capturing your thoughts and renewing your mind. Is there anyone you are not forgiving? Maybe that’s why. You need to forgive and mean it. You are being turned over to tormentors because you are not doing these things.”

Facing these barrages of comments and well-meaning advice can end up becoming added fodder when it’s all the person who is requesting prayer hears. The enemy can take this and twist it and use it to condemn the person who is already being weakened by the attacks they have been facing. The well meaning advice can do more harm than help.

The other evening I was listening to a teaching and the speaker stated “If you are doing everything, renewing your mind, not taking offense, not living in sin, God is going to protect you. He’s not going to let the enemy get to you. You are protected by him.”

But is this always the case?

What does the Bible say?

Job lived righteously yet God allowed Satan to wreak havoc on his life. Terrible things happened to him and his family though he was doing nothing wrong. His friends saw all this and insisted that it was because he was doing something he out not to be. Why did this happen? Because God, in His sovereignty, allowed it.

In Luke 22:31 we find that Satan asked the Lord if he could sift Peter. God allowed it, however Jesus prayed for him that his faith may not fail.

As we see, just because a person is living righteously, it does not mean that God will not allow the enemy to sift them once in a while.

In John 9 we are told about a man who was born blind. His disciples asked Jesus who had sinned, this man or his parents. Jesus had replied “Neither. The man was born blind so that the works of God would be made manifest in him”

Sometimes God will allow the enemy to attack you even if you have been renewing your mind, capturing all your thoughts, doing all the things that you know to do. God will allow things that are negative happen to show us miracles of his goodness, mercy and love for us.

Often our first instinct is to hurry up and point out what is wrong in a persons life when the enemy comes to attack but the Bible clearly shows this is not always the case. We should remember to be gracious to those who find themselves in such a position. Pray for them. Ask the Lord for revelation,wisdom and discernment. Things are not always as they seem. Trials are a test of Faith.

God has His reasons for allowing things that to happen that are beyond our human understanding.

His thoughts are above our thoughts.

His ways are not our ways.

Sometimes it’s a refining process.

Sometimes it’s for another reason.

It’s not always a result of “messing up” or falling into sin.

No matter what, we can always know that God turns everything to our good for His glory.

In both my friend’s circumstance and my own, God had revealed to us that it wasn’t anything necessarily that we were doing wrong. We both kept persevering, praying, seeking God and held on to our faith even as the storms darkened. And then, Breakthrough! She through prayer from another and I through a dream where God showed me that He had heard me and he was answering my prayer. From that moment on, everything stopped. All the major struggles, and specifically for me, breakthrough in an area that I had been struggling through for years.

It’s always darkest before the dawn.

So remember to ask God for wisdom in every situation. Sometimes a person may be dealing with something, and God will send them to you for help. And while this may be a test of the person’s faith, it could also be a test for you to see how you will respond and how you will attempt to help this person. How God can be made manifest in their lives through you. There’s a lesson in this for all of us. Remember to love one another, offer grace, be merciful, and don’t jump to conclusions.

Baptism Do-over

~ Observant Servant

Growing up I had been baptized a couple times as a teen. But I just did it because I was in a group of kids who were doing it. It was “the cool thing” to do as part of a youth group. The parents lined us all up and like ducks in a row and one by one we marched up one side of the baptismal, got dunked, and exited the opposite side in front of the congregation. I didn’t remember anything else about it other than getting a free t-shirt afterward.

Fast forward to December 2020, I had it on my heart to get baptized for real this time. However I had much anxiety about the prospect of it. I was in love with Jesus and I was fully aware the meaning behind it. However, as the days led up to it, I had no excitement. I was losing sleep and being plagued with panic attacks.

December 13, 2020 I stood in on the stairs to the baptismal shaking from intense fear as the announcements were read at the church. Waves of dizziness washed over me and I had nearly passed out at least twice. Were it not for the white-knuckled vice-like grip I had on the hand rail, I would have fallen down the stairs. As they announced my name, I entered the baptismal, trembling in fear. My expectation was that it would be washed away when I came up from the water. However, to my dismay, after being dunked, I found I was still unable to escape the fear. I felt ashamed and confused. I didn’t understand.

Where was the joy? Where was the freedom I witnessed others experience during this public commitment to Christ? Why didn’t I have it? Was I broken? Was there something wrong with me?

I left church feeling like I had lost something though I couldn’t put my finger on it. In the days to weeks that had followed, the more I replayed the day in my mind, the more depressed I became. I imagined Father and the angels had watched me that day with expressionless faces.

I continued to think on this a lot through the following years. I had attended other baptisms and witnessed the joy and joined in the celebration of others as they made their public announcement to dedicate their lives to our Lord and Savior. Each time I felt more confused as to why I didn’t have that experience and my depression grew due to my lack of understanding. Eventually I didn’t want to be a part of these celebrations anymore.

Then yesterday I was at the Carter’s and it was announced that Charlie was going to be baptized. My initial thought was to just leave because I didn’t want to be reminded of my own perceived failed baptism again. But I didn’t want to be rude or offend anyone so I stayed. As he and his wife were baptized, I witnessed the peace and joy that fell over them and again my confusion about my experience rolled around in my head. I was happy for both of them but inside my heart was longing for the same experience. And when Bro Mike joyfully asked “who’s next?” the desire hit my heart but I kept my silence. I was dressed in jeans and a sweatshirt and had not brought a change of clothes.

As Bro Mike looked at each person for takers, the Lord reminded me of Acts 8:26-39 when Philip had baptized the eunuch on the road. Water was available and he had seized the opportunity.

When Bro Mike’s eyes landed on me, I felt the familiar fear rise up in me again. I also felt waves of shame and humiliation that I even needed it again. Thoughts filled my head in rapid succession. “I was on the ministry team. I should have it together. I was going to look foolish. I’ll lose respect.” The enemy bombarded my mind using my voice.

Initially I declined. Again, I wasn’t prepared. I had no change of clothes and I’m not exactly at a size where I could just borrow some. But then I was reminded again to seize the opportunity. So I shoved the thoughts out of my mind in determination and hope that this time would be different.

As I stepped into the pool, I felt the fear manifest again. I almost started to cry. Two steps in I felt myself hesitate. The thoughts started coming. “Was I really going to put myself through this torment again?” But I recognized these were not my thoughts.

I felt my body stiffen as I was lead into the pool. I was trying to keep from shaking. I didn’t want the fear I was feeling to show. Bro Mike instructed me to relax and when I did, the fear that had been hiding rose up. I felt the terror and it wanted to get out of the pool. As they did a prayer of deliverance my entire body started shaking and I started crying thinking “oh no, not again”. I wanted to be free of this fear so badly. I kept thinking “Lord please help me”.

There was a point where I did lose control and the fear demon tried to bolt bolt in an attempt to get me out but gratefully, both Mikes had a tight hold on me and kept it from happening.

It was a battle but when it finally left, I knew for a fact it was gone. I felt it lift off me. So on June 22, 2024, this time when I went under, I felt the joy that I had been missing. I felt the peace of God and it stayed with me. 🙌🏻❤️

Deliverance is such an integral part of the Christian walk. When I was baptized before, I didn’t know anything about deliverance. The church didn’t practice it and though I was fully committed to Christ, I was still in torment. It was an angry strongman of fear that was manifesting during that baptism but because the church was unaware, it was not recognized as the issue. The enemy has tricked Christians into believing that anxiety, fear, and depression are merely mental illnesses. In reality, they are demonic entities that have taken up residence.

📖 Hosea 4:6 says “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge..”

I am living proof. Despite being saved, despite having a deep love for God, despite being born again, I was being destroyed by the enemy because I did not know how to deal with him. And neither did anyone around me.

I praise God for setting me free. 🙌🏻

Demons and Deliverance

~ Observant Servant

There’s a portion of my testimony I don’t talk about much and that portion has to do with how badly demons were tormenting me. How terrified I was. I became paranoid. Confused. Thought I was losing my mind. The first time I admitted to what I went through, I was told by a well-meaning Christian, that it was merely a “mid-life crisis”. After that, I never mentioned the depths of torment that I went through again.

In fact, the only time I have openly admitted to it was when I heard someone else talking about their experience. And at that moment I was in tears because I was so relieved I wasn’t alone in my experience.

Demons are nasty and some of the worst ones are let in when a person becomes involved with the occult. I embraced the occult at a young age while still under my parents roof. My mom had her own past that I only know bits of. I know that she was no “dabbler” but into heavy duty stuff that had serious repercussions down the family line. Even after she became a ‘Christian”, I was still raised watching shows like Bewitched, I Dream of Jeannie, Twilight Zone and Tales from the Crypt on a regular basis. Add to that everything Disney had to offer and well, there you see my upbringing was soaked in witchcraft.

I turned fully into the occult by the time I was a teen. That went on for 35 years but in reality, it was my entire life.

When I found myself looking in the direction to Christ for answers, the demons in my life suddenly began rearing their ugly heads. Even though I wasn’t drinking or taking drugs, my mental state went on a terrifying downward spiral toward an abyss that I only knew I wanted no part of.

They began ganging up on me with demons in other people. Thoughts would flow through my mind and the people around me would either say exactly what I was thinking or make a comment about my exact thoughts without me saying a word. It was so horrible. I couldn’t escape my mind. It drove me to God.. and when I committed to Christ, it didn’t get better. In fact it got so much worse. Because now I had switched teams. The threats and visions I got were so intense that had I not been where I was at when it happened, I would have taken myself out in an effort to escape.

Christianity is supernatural.
You can’t escape it.
There is a real unseen realm where the most intense wars are fought.
Any Christian who thinks otherwise or thinks they can skate by and avoid it is fooling themselves.
They are blind.

All of that was part of my journey of deliverance. The only thing was I didn’t realize that I was in the process of it. I still had no idea of what I was up against.

As I stated before, becoming a Christian didn’t stop the torment. When I came to Christ through this process, the Holy Spirit was literally all I had. I didn’t own a Bible and I was in a facility that had no books available. In fact there was nothing available other than a tv with super bad reception. I spent (what I later found out was) a week straight in a large “L-shaped” room with about 20-25 other people. Though had you asked me what day it was or even what time of day it was, I wouldn’t have been able to tell you. It felt like I was outside of time and space. I was aware it was passing but mentally I was outside of it, watching it pass. (Again, this was sober – I had no drugs or alcohol in my system and yet I felt like I was trapped riding a terrifying high.)

It was during this time that I began the process of learning how to hear the Holy Spirit. It was a crash-course in spiritual warfare that continued for months even after I made it back home. Initially it was like my mind was downloading all sorts of information. The veil had been pulled from my eyes and I saw the battle for souls. I watched it play out. I had visions of the wins and losses for both sides. Things that I can’t even describe.

While the enemy filled my mind with threats telling me I would never be safe, that I had a target on my back, that they would never leave me alone, cushioning me with more and more fear, the Holy Spirit would make His presence known to me, promising me that I would be kept safe just as long as I would believe and trust Him. While the enemy would manifest in the people around me and they would talk amongst themselves making their plans against me within earshot, I would pray to walk by them unseen and be amazed when those same people would pass me by as if I was invisible.

When I finally got my hands on the Bible, I began to devour it. After a particularly heavy spiritual attack one night (I was seeing demons manifest themselves outside my bedroom window) I cried out to God for several hours in prayer. I awoke the next morning with the word “Ephesians” on my heart and I began the process of learning who I was in Christ. Slowly my mind became clear. I was still being tormented but I was finally able to function mentally. I believe this was the Holy Spirit showing me how to renew my mind. I stopped seeing spirits and I began to attend church and I felt like my battle was over for the most part.

Or so I thought.

I found a church that did outreach. They had sound doctrine and were really nice people. I shared with them the spiritual side of my journey and their response was one of disbelief. It was nothing like they had ever been through so they couldn’t relate it seemed. They never really talked about the spiritual realm to a level that I seemed to have lived through.

After that, I kept things to myself. I was still suffering. I had major depression. I still had a lot of anxiety and although the urge to end my life was no longer there, intrusive thoughts would come at random. Even on my good days where I truly felt blessed by God. The most common thought I had on a regular basis was a vision of me stabbing myself in my throat. I didn’t know why.

I was often questioned as to why I didn’t have the joy of the Lord and I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t have an answer. I didn’t know that I was still in a battle. I would read the Bible, go to church, worship, pray, share the Gospel and yet I was still in chains. I wasn’t growing fast enough, praying hard enough, doing enough… These thoughts came into my mind and were echoed and pointed out by those around me.

As humans, even the best of us fall short. The enemy doesn’t fight fair and shortly after that I found myself isolated, completely rejected, and curled up in my closet sobbing from the depths of my heart begging God for mercy because I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what was wrong with me and when my first church family pushed me away, I thought God had abandoned me.

That I was a hopeless cause and a wasted effort.

Then I felt “John 6:37” in my heart.

“All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never turn away.”

I clung to this scripture, repeating it over and over to myself. I was in a state of desperation.

The next day, I got a message that told me to look into Hardcore Christianity.

Looking at the name, the thought came into my mind that this was where they send the toughest cases. The delinquents. The “rebellious individuals who refuse to surrender. A boot camp for the worst of the worst Christians who fail at being a Christian. Like when parents send their kids off to military school to “straighten them out”. I had no idea what to expect. Even after reading the information on the site I was still terrified. But I wanted so desperately to be fixed.

It was only after I watched a teaching by Mike Smith that I came to the full realization that I was still under attack. That all the thoughts I had were not my own. That there were still demons at work inside me and around me. That I wasn’t free. That they had been using both those around me and my own thoughts to skillfully orchestrate my destruction. That the images and thoughts I was having were not me but those of a completely separate entity inside me. Multiple ones at that.

It has been a process, dealing with the layers upon layers of spirits. One of the most important things is mind renewal. This is also a constant thing. An area that you can not, MUST NOT, become complacent in. Lack of mind renewal is like cracks in your armor. You MUST renew your mind and continue to do so. If you do not, the enemy will eat you up and spit you out. The demons will come back like bad relationships. You must get rid of your sin. Learn to hate your sin. Ask God to help you hate your sin.

Deliverance is a journey. The best news is that God is helping you through it. If you are born again, you have the Holy Spirit and you cannot lose.

If you suffer from anything like I have posted above, There is hope!!

Please contact mike@hardcorechristianity.com

https://hardcorechristianity.com/arizona-deliverance-center/

Symptoms of Demonic Operation in a Person

~ Observant Servant ~ 1 Comment

One major item of debate in Christianity is whether or not a born-again Christian can have demons. Fact of the matter is, the Bible does not specifically say that a Christian cannot be infected with demons. However there are several instances in Scripture showing that a person can be infected with them. I have personally been prayed for and received healing through deliverance and it has changed my life. I am so grateful to God for this. Learning about this has helped change my perspective of the world around me. This understanding has helped me to forgive others (and myself). Here is a breakdown of some of the symptoms that a person (even Christians) can be dealing with demons spiritually.

haunted

“They came to the [a]other side of the sea, to the region of the Gerasenes. When Jesus got out of the boat, immediately a man from the tombs with an unclean spirit met Him, and the man lived in the [b]tombs, and no one could bind him anymore, not even with chains. For he had often been bound with shackles [for the feet] and with chains, and he tore apart the chains and broke the shackles into pieces, and no one was strong enough to subdue and tame him. Night and day he was constantly screaming and shrieking among the tombs and on the mountains, and cutting himself with [sharp] stones.

Mark 5:1-5 AMP

Incapacity for normal living –
Mark 5:1-5

Just as the actions of Legion made the man unsuitable for normal social interactions with friends and family, an unusual desire for solitude, accompanied by deep loneliness, will often set in.The person will often become very passive with no desire to change.

Extreme behavior-
Mark 5:4

“For he had often been bound with shackles [for the feet] and with chains, and he tore apart the chains and broke the shackles into pieces, and no one was strong enough to subdue and tame him.”

Violence will often be evident in the victims life. An explosive temper and extreme, uncontrollable anger are dangerous behaviors that control the individual and the people who love him or her.

Personality changes-
Mark 5:9 & 12

“He was asking him, “What is your name?” And he replied, “My name is Legion; for we are many.” … “And the demons begged Him, saying, “Send us to the pigs so that we may go into them!”

Multiple personalities exist in some of the most serious cases of demonic control. This man had a ‘legion’ of spirits within his life. All cases of multiple personality are demonic. Changes in personality, extreme or mild, is evidence of demonic activity.

Restlessness and Insomnia
Mark 5:5

” Night and day he was constantly screaming and shrieking among the tombs and on the mountains, and cutting himself with [sharp] stones.”

In verse 5, we see this man crying in the tombs “night and day”. He could not sleep. Insomnia can be a sign of a physical problem or a sign of a spiritual problem. God has gifted His children with sleep.

It is vain for you to rise up early, to take rest late, to eat the bread of [anxious] toil–for He gives [blessings] to His beloved in sleep.” (Psalm 127:2)

So when you cannot sleep night after night and there is no medical reason for this disturbance, the devil may be tormenting you. Don’t forget, you have the right to rest in Jesus!

A terrible inner anguish
Mark 5:5

This man was deeply tormented in mind and heart. Various levels of anguish are evident in those who are afflicted by demons. Grief and anguish are normal emotions for us all. Yet persistent, unresolved anguish that will not leave after normal therapies of counseling, encouragement and prayer could well be demonic.

Self inflicted injury and suicide
Mark 5:5

Here we see the demonic man cutting himself. If you read Mark 9:14-29, you will see the story of a man whose son was both deaf and mute because of a demon: “wherever it [the evil spirit] seizes him, it throws him down… Often he [the demon] has thrown him [the boy] into fire and and into the water to destroy him” (vs 18, 22) Jesus cast out the demon: “the spirit cried out, convulsed him [the boy] greatly, and came out of him.

If you or someone you know are struggling with any of these symptoms, I invite you to email mike@hardcorechristianity.com for a counseling appointment. Appointments are always free for born-again believers. They can be done via phone, zoom, or in-person. Please also visit HardCoreChristianity.com for more information, teachings and videos. This Ministry has helped me and many others immensely in my walk with Christ.

Learning to Pray

~ Observant Servant

Prayer for Beginners

In my personal prayer life, I have found that I always begin my prayers with a thankful heart. The Lord gives us so much to be thankful for from the time we wake up to the moment we go to bed. His grace is continuous. Sometimes I feel led to just pray a prayer of thanksgiving. The Lord knows what we need even before we ask. There are times when I will come to Him with a list of people and things to pray for and about and I don’t even get to the list because I just feel led to praise Him and thank Him during my prayer time.

Every day is a gift within a gift. It’s another chance to work for Him; another chance to get close to Him. Being thankful for everything He has done, everything He is doing, and everything He will do. He is so good that it is impossible to not find anything to be thankful for even in the direst of times.

 “Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;” –Ephesians 6:18 KJV

  In the beginning of my walk (as a newly born again Christian) I found it a bit difficult to pray for myself. Praying for others came easily! I was surrounded by people who were unsaved. God had just revealed to me a portion of the depths of His love for us and the abundance of grace that He had to offer. I wanted everyone in my life to have that. I wanted them to experience the true feeling of what it was like to be set free. To be forgiven. To know, without a doubt, that their eternal life was secure in Christ. I would spend considerable amounts of time in prayer begging and pleading for God to intervene and soften the hearts of those around me so that they might also find the road to salvation. I would pray for everyone else first but when it came to praying for me personally, I felt hindered. I already had Jesus. What more could I possibly need?

I found it difficult to ask for even the smallest of things, let alone plead for myself and my desires. It was almost as if I felt guilty for taking up the time of my Creator to ask for anything so prayers for myself were cut short as possible. Eventually the Lord showed me that those feelings were lies from the enemy. Satan will do all he can to drive a wedge between us and the Father. I found the recognizing these feelings as actual spiritual attacks embolden me to pray for myself with the same effort as praying for others.

  It is important to pray intensely for others but remember to put forth that same earnest when praying for yourself. Think if you had a son, daughter or spouse who had a need or desire and they just barely mentioned it at all. What kind of relationship would that be? God wants us to bring our desires up in prayer. He wants to provide for us the way a Father does. It is who He is. It is His nature. Let the Spirit lead you in prayer. Move with Faith. Talk to Him every day, several times a day. The Lord never tires of hearing from us.