Sacrifice of Praise

“And then Job arose and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground and worshiped. And said, “Naked I came out of my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord givith and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.”
-Job 1:20-21

There are seasons when I return to the book of Job, not because it is easy to read, but because it is honest.

Many people struggle with it. It feels heavy. A righteous man. A faithful man. And God allows everything to be stripped away. His home, his livelihood, his children, his health. It almost feels unbearable to witness. And yet, woven through the anguish is something steady. Job’s refusal to let go of God, even when he could not understand Him.

For reasons I didn’t fully grasp at the time, the Holy Spirit led me through Job in the early months after I was born again. I remember reading it slowly, trying to absorb what it meant to trust God when nothing made sense. Looking back, I can see that I was being prepared.

Because not long after I finished the book, my own life unraveled.

Within a short span of time, I lost friendships. I lost my place to live. I didn’t own a car, so when relationships fractured, I also lost transportation and my job. One of those same “friends” left me carrying a heavy financial burden. My relationship with my daughter collapsed. My father passed away. The hits came so quickly that I barely had space to breathe between them.

I was broken in ways I didn’t have language for. Angry. Grieving. Regretful. Confused.

And yet, even in the grief of losing my dad, I could see mercy. His passing was nearly instant. That mattered to me. I thanked God for that small kindness in the middle of so much loss. It felt strange to be thankful while hurting, but gratitude became a lifeline.

Throughout that storm, Job stayed in my thoughts. I remembered how he worshiped even while he wept. How he wrestled honestly with God, but never abandoned Him. How he refused to curse the One he did not understand.

So I tried to do the same.

Some days, my praise felt thin. Some days it felt like a whisper more than a song. But I thanked God for what remained. For breath. For salvation. For being pulled out of darkness. For the cross. For the lessons I didn’t yet understand. I thanked Him for the fact that I was still alive to learn them.

Something shifted in me during that time. The circumstances did not immediately change. The pain did not disappear overnight. But peace began to settle in places that had once been frantic. It was not denial. It was not pretending. It was a quiet assurance that God was still present in the rubble.

In time, restoration came. Not in the exact shape I had imagined, but in ways that were better than what I lost. New friendships. A place to live. A vehicle. Healing in some family relationships. Provision I could not have orchestrated on my own. God rebuilt in ways that felt both tender and strong.

There are still areas waiting on His timing. But I no longer panic in the waiting.

Even now, as I walk through another uncertain season, I find myself returning to that same posture. Praise in the middle of not knowing. Trust in the absence of visible answers. I think of Abraham stepping away from everything familiar, not with a map, but with a promise. I imagine the mixture of fear and faith in that obedience.

There is a reason Scripture calls it a “sacrifice of praise.” A sacrifice costs something. When your heart aches, when your body is weary, when confusion clouds your direction, praise does not come naturally. It is offered. Chosen. Laid down.

The enemy would prefer silence. He would prefer bitterness. He would prefer that pain close your mouth and harden your heart.

But praise disrupts that strategy.

Praise anchors you in truth when emotions are unstable. Praise reminds your soul of who God is, even when you do not understand what He is doing. Praise opens space for peace to enter.

I have learned this slowly, through tears more than triumph. When you lift your voice — even trembling — something shifts. Not always the circumstance. But you.

And in that shift, you begin to sense it again: He is faithful.

Even here.
Even now.

Father,

You are the God who sees every season of our lives — the joyful ones and the ones that feel like walking through ruins. You see the moments when our hearts are strong with faith, and You see the moments when we barely have the strength to whisper Your name.

Lord, thank You for never abandoning us in the middle of our suffering. Your Word reminds us, “The LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” (Job 1:21, KJV). Teach my heart to hold that same posture of trust, even when I do not understand the path before me.

Forgive me for the times I have allowed fear, bitterness, or confusion to speak louder than faith. When my circumstances feel overwhelming, help me remember that You are still present in the rubble. You are still working in ways I cannot yet see.

Give me the courage to offer the sacrifice of praise. Even when my voice trembles. Even when my understanding is incomplete. Let praise rise from my heart not because everything is easy, but because You are faithful.

Your Word says, “By him therefore let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually, that is, the fruit of our lips giving thanks to his name.” (Hebrews 13:15, KJV). Let gratitude anchor my soul when everything around me feels uncertain.

Strengthen my trust, Lord. Quiet my anxious thoughts. Help me walk forward step by step, knowing that You are guiding me, even when the road is unclear.

And just as You restored Job in Your time, remind me that You are still a God who restores, heals, and rebuilds what has been broken.

I place my life, my losses, and my future into Your hands.

In Jesus’ name, amen.

Healing of the Heart and the Role of Deliverance

One of the biggest things I have struggled with is allowing others to get close to me. Like many of you, there have been severe wounds inflicted on my heart that left deep scars and even more areas that have left my heart raw. Lies, betrayal, abandonment, feelings of worthlessness. For years, most (if not all) of my adult life, my heart bore the weight of this burden. It manifested itself on the outside as well in more ways than one. Sure my attitude could be forced into an appearance of everything being great in my life, but there was a spirit of depression on me.

Yes, Christians can be infested with demonic spirits. I know that there is a lot of controversy surrounding this topic. The thing is, the enemy copies everything of God. We know this. He twists it, he perverts it, he makes as a appealing as possible to the masses and, sadly, fools even the followers of Christ. The subject of the gifts such as the gift of tongues and Deliverance is no exception to this. One must pray for discernment not to be deceived.

The spirit of depression manifested itself through my creativity. My inspiration always came from a wounded heart steeped in rejection and isolation, and if I am being honest, unforgiveness . Art projects reflected dismal, dreary and sometimes even dark scenes. Creative writing while pouring out my heart, always resulted in the saddest of stories. When I would create, the mask would fall away and even the most cheerful colors were laced with scenes of heartache. Repentance and surrender to Christ changes that.

Once I forgave others and myself (you MUST forgive yourself), God began the process of healing my heart. It was often a struggle. Every loving touch hurt. My heart was battered and bruised. It had areas of infection that needed to be cleaned. With any wound, the cleansing process is unpleasant. Sometimes it hurts terribly as the antiseptic is used to wash away all of the infected areas. The process of cleansing the heart is no different. In order for the healing process to be effective, God must cleanse it first. This means exposing unwanted areas. But the Lord God has the most gentle touch and the most loving way to handle tender hearts to make them whole again. The result is feeling so much lighter and freer and experiencing true joy.

God has been working on my heart. As with all healing, it takes time. It is a process. There are times that it took prayer and fasting and there were times it took something stronger. An army of prayer warriors and deliverance.  The most uncomfortable part of it was the exposing of my wounded areas to God and others. Becoming even more vulnerable. Admitting I was still hurting. Being reminded of those painful times in my life that I just wanted to bury and hide away. They had to come out. They had to be exposed. Like any wound, if you just cover it up, infection sets in. So my wounds had to be uncovered in order to be attended to. After prayer and deliverance from the spirits that were haunting me, I felt cleaner. My heart was lighter. My soul could breathe. Jesus set me free. Repentance, forgiveness and deliverance were the method. I am so grateful and I pray that each one of you can experience the love of God through being set free.

Your Christian walk is to be filled with joy despite the circumstances you find yourself in. The only way to have that joy is to surrender to Jesus.

Father,

You see every hidden wound, every place in my heart that I have tried to protect, cover, or bury. You know the betrayals, the abandonment, the lies that tried to define me. You know the weight of rejection I have carried and the shame I have wrestled with in silence.

Lord, I bring my heart to You again.

Where it is bruised, touch it gently.
Where it is infected, cleanse it.
Where it is hardened, soften it.
Where it is still afraid to trust, breathe courage into it.

I choose to forgive — not because it was easy, not because it didn’t hurt, but because You forgave me. I release those who wounded me. I release the accusations I have held against myself. I refuse to partner with bitterness, rejection, or depression any longer.

In the name of Jesus, I renounce every spirit that attached itself to my pain. Every lie that says I am unworthy, unlovable, or alone — I reject it. I receive Your truth instead.

Heal my heart, Lord. Cleanse what needs cleansing. Expose what needs exposing. Give me the humility to let You and others see the tender places so they can be made whole.

Teach me how to love again without fear.
Teach me how to be vulnerable without shame.
Teach me how to walk in joy — real joy — that comes from surrender.

Fill the places that once held darkness with Your light. Replace heaviness with freedom. Replace sorrow with gladness. Replace isolation with holy connection.

Thank You for Your patient hands. Thank You for not rushing the process. Thank You for never abandoning me in my brokenness.

I surrender my heart to You completely.

In Jesus’ name,
Amen.